Sunday, March 3, 2013

from life's FIRST cry to FINAL breath

well, i'm not sure how to really start this post. the past week has been an emotional whirlwind & probably one of the most mentally draining & chaotic weeks of my life.
here's my best shot at giving a brief summary:

 my grammy went to the emergency room on february 22nd. things were not looking good - heart & kidney failure. she was in ICU. our family was there everyday. each day we heard different reports, but basically the fact was her body was shutting down.

this was also the week that my sister was due with her third child. she started contracting tuesday night & a beautiful new niece was born wednesday morning! what a precious blessing!

the sign we woke up to!
little legacy.

lovely family of 5!

cute cousins - helo & penelope

meanwhile, every day grammy seemed to be less & less responsive. it was very obvious that she had little time left here on earth. on saturday, march 2nd, my dad receive a call in the early morning that he should come to the hospital right away. dad woke everyone up, then he left immediately. mom left shortly after. the rest of departed about 30 minutes later. dad called us saying the doctor informed them that he didn't believe she would pass away that day. he was predicting sunday or even possibly monday so there was no need to rush right away. at this point we were already half way to the hospital. once we got there we spent some time with grammy. we were there for about an hour when we realized that no one had really eaten breakfast. mayci took the kids (minus mysti) to grab some breakfast to bring back. during this time those in the room started noticing that her breathing was becoming very spaced out & even more shallow than before. i remember amy saying she thought the moment would be coming soon. dad was holding one hand. mom was holding the other. mysti, amy, & i were gathered around. wow. what an emotional time. so many things racing in your mind. words you should have said. things you should have done. pondering God's sovereignty. amazed that God has determined every breath we will take. thankful that He answered prayers. grateful for the moments shared with grammy. it's difficult to write about now. thankfully, the group that was gone arrived back around 9:00am. everyone was able to say their goodbyes. grammy peacefully passed away into eternity at 9:19am. no more pain. no more struggles.

i wanted to write this out now because the past 10 days have been a blur. i  have no desire to proofread now so i will probably be appalled when i reread this but that's okay.

this is my all-time favorite photo of grammy. i believe it was from the 1940s.

looking through many old photos today. i forgot about this one from last year when i introduced grammy to the blurriness we call the front camera. she is so cute!

what a creative, spunky, innovative, & sweet Grammy she was! i'm so thankful for her & she will be greatly missed. she was a fighter to the very end! i'm incredible grateful for the way she raised her son that grew up to be my wonderful, godly dad. i could write a whole separate post boasting in the way my dad has humbly fulfilled his biblical duty of taking care of his widowed mother throughout the years. this past week, he would rise up super early to get to the hospital a couple hours before he went to work, work a full day, then spend the entire evening until late night with her getting maybe 4-5 hours of sleep each night. she was one blessed lady! =)
when she was in the hospital during the final week of her life, Grammy was not able to communicate well, but one of her last (audibly clear) words of wisdom was to teach the Bible to your children & your children's children (Deut. 4:9). i pray that this command is fulfilled in the future generations of this family.

i realize this post is pretty much the definition of rambling. i don't think i've ever been good at summarizing, especially when it comes to writing.
here's two final quotes that have been running in my head this week:

1. "no guilt in life, no fear in death
    this is the power of Christ in me
    from life's FIRST cry to FINAL breath,
    Jesus commands my destiny"

2. "The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away;
      blessed be the name of the Lord." Job 1:21

also, a big THANK YOU to everyone who has prayed for us during this difficult time. the support & love of our church family is incredible. 


Stephanie Lee said...

Thank you.
Incredibly blessed by this post.
Praying for y'all still while praising our good and faithful God.
Love you!